The Strange and Unusual World of J.R. Rodriguez

Old and ugly? To Hell with that! I’m youthful and beautiful!

darkunderling — Thu, 25 Aug 2011 22:43:52 +0000

I had said that I would write a blog about being old. This is it. I wondered about how to write this. I could either talk about the ideals of youth and beauty (as it related to age and aging) or I could talk about the process of getting older. I chose both. Why not?

In most western culture, unfortunately, youth and beauty is highly prized and sought after. I am sure it’s also prized in other cultures as well but I am going to talk about that. I want to talk about those ideals as they operate here in this country. They play in important role in how we perceive others. I think perhaps the media is blame for this. Everywhere one looks, magazines glamourize those who are thin, very attractive, and young. When is the last time you saw a cover with an “ordinary” person? You know, one who works with you, goes to school with you, rides on the same train as you. You more than likely have not. This puts a lot of pressure on people, especially young women. They see these images of models and think that is how they are supposed to be. It causes eating disorders and plays havoc on self image. Major magazines, TV shows. musicians, and movies hardly ever put out positive messages of being proud of who you are (I know, Lady Gaga is an exception). I think most of them perpetuate the image of the “Desirable” to be one who is the epitome of striking beauty and everlasting youth. I am quite self conscious about getting older. I am not any of those things and that is fine with me. However it does cause a bit insecurity when I see articles in newspapers an such that talk only about someone being a “hottie, “cutie”, or whatever. The inner person is never dicussed. It’s as if all they are idols to be worshipped by the lesser. Aging happens. It’s a fact of living. In this culture, I see that it is something to be feared and avoided. Stay as young as you can for as long as you can. Getting older resigns you to the grave. When did this happen? Have we grown so dependent on the media to tell us how we should be and not paid attention to how we are? Until we as a culture learn to embrace ourselves for who and what we are (and not worry about the images that tell us different), we will overlook the goodness and beauty that lies within us all.

On getting older. As I said above, I am a bit self conscious about my age. While I am not ancient, I am not a spring chicken, either. Going along with what I said above, I know that people get old. So, I should be OK, right? I am mostly. However, there’s that little bit of me that avoids looking in a mirror because I may be horrified at what I see. Then again, there is a part of me that thinks that age is relative. It’s about how we deal with getting older. I try to keep a “youthful” mind (open thinking, not being afraid of change) as well as a fit physical form (healthy!). In that case, the “mostly” part of me sees me as a young person, I just have a number assigned to me. It’s merely a number and that is all. It doesn’t make me. What I am is what I am on the inside. Of course, there’s no fighting nature in some aspects but I do try to keep myself active. I believe it’s when we resign ourselves to certain categories (an old guy) that we fail to live up to potential that we have. It’s about rising above the inner “drill sargent”, the images in the media, and the fear of change. Only then can we be more than what we think we are.

Book Reviews for Author Friends

darkunderling — Thu, 16 Jun 2011 17:43:51 +0000

I decided that I will start reviewing books of my author friends. First up is Tonia Brown. I next plan to do one for Pat’s “Dark” Trilogy. Updates as they come

Updates and Other Junk

darkunderling — Fri, 20 May 2011 17:46:33 +0000

School is done for the semester. I am now officially a senior in the nursing program at UMass Boston. I feel like I need to have the theme song to “Star Trek Enterprise” playing here now. To quote it: “It’s been a long road/To get from there to here”. I know all the work and effort will hopefully pay off and I can leave the retail world.

The book is going forward. It’s being formatted by friend and fellow author Kody Boye. I am currently in negotiations with a talented young artist about a cover. I am very excited and this is a GREAT way to end a semester.

On a more personal note: I am currently trying to get my mood regulated. It’s been very “labile” as they call it in the field. In other words, it swings back and forth drastically. It was hard to get things done in school and my grades went down a bit (10 and 12 points). But I am on a mood regulator now (lamotrogine or lamictal). It’s slowly starting to work. This has been something I’ve been living with since I was 17. Now, it’s just taking a new form. All will be well, though.

Thanks for reading! Will keep everyone posted on the progress of the book!

Who are you?

darkunderling — Tue, 10 May 2011 19:26:57 +0000

Are you the same person you were a year ago? Five? Ten? You may say “No, I am not the same person I was back then but I am still me.”

That still leaves us nowhere. What does it mean to be you? If you’ve changed (both bodily and psychologically), then you are not really you. “You” changed. That would mean that I am not John Rodriguez. It would mean I’d be someone else. But that’s stupid, you’re saying. Of course you’re still John Rodriguez, don’t be ridiculous. But if I acknowledge that, then it would mean that I don’t (or haven’t) change(d); that John is the same person over a lifetime despite changing. That’s not possible.

What then makes us the same person while also being a different person over time? Is it the memories we have? I remember high school, moving to Massachuetts, and getting married. I was a different person each of those times, yet I am still the same person. I don’t remember some of childhood. Does that mean that I wasn’t a person then? That because I have no memory that the person I was then never existed? I’ve grown older. I am not the same physically as I was in high school, yet I am still me. Who was I back then if not who I am today? If I say I am the same person then that would mean that there are two of me: one that exists as John and one that exists as John is today.

What constitutes personhood? What makes you you? Why are you still (insert name here) and not someone else if you’ve changed over time?

Keeping UP With the Deadlanders

darkunderling — Tue, 08 Mar 2011 18:41:06 +0000

I’ve gotten the OK from my publisher to announce the official acceptance of my first young adult horror novel, Keeping Up With the Deadlanders. The project originally began as a short story that eventually ended up at Fantastichorror.com. Even when it was being written, I had no plans to do anything with it. However, once I got into the website and started interacting with the good folks over there, I decided to submit it. They soon published it online. I also had some friends read it and enjoy. That spurred me to write a second tale for the website. Again, good reception gave me the fuel to keep going. Before I knew it, the three tales became four. Four became five. Doc Pus at The Library of The Living Dead expressed interest in the tales. At the time, I knew that I was going for a novel but it wasn’t complete (and I still had some time at Fantastic Horror…first rights for year). I told him I would give it to him once I was done. In November, I gave it to him and he agreed to take under the newly formed Little Library of the Living Dead banner.

I couldn’t have done this without the support from my family, friends, and online writing cohorts. I also owe a great deal of thanks both Fantastic Horror and Doc Pus for believing in me as to take my work. The novel is still some way away from seeing print, but that is how the publishing game is.

Here is a brief synopsis:

Famine is like any other teen ager. He’s trying to make friends, fit in, and figure out his place in life. The only difference is that he’s been dead for over two hundred fifty years. It doesn’t help that he’s in a family of Death Omens and Soul Collectors, either. His father is the grandaddy of all symbols of death and dying, The Grim Reaper, and his mother is La Llorona, the Weeping Woman of Hispanic folklore. When he joins his Uncle Ankou, the Breton personification of Death, for jaunty soul collection rides, things get a lot more interesting. Famine soon discovers that Death is just as exciting and thrilling as life as he meets an array of strange, and sometimes dangerous, beings.

I look forward to seeing this and I hope that I can find a fan base. I am very attached to the characters and would love to see them loved as much as I love them

A Break in the Clouds

darkunderling — Wed, 22 Dec 2010 06:12:27 +0000

For the last few months, school has taken over my life. I wrote as much as I could before classes began thinking I could do a little whenever I could. That didn’t happen. Letters from the Dead came out before the semester started and I had two more acceptances pending. I completed, had edited, and turned in my first novel, Keeping Up With the Deadlanders. It was actually something in the works for the last two and half years and I put the finishing touches on it in September. Now that class is over for a month, I will be back writing again. I have already jotted down ideas for the second Deadlanders book and have been polishing up a pre-existing tale for another LOTLD Press anthology. Just recently, Zombiality: A Queer Bent on the Undead came to print with my effort, “Among the Living”. I am quite proud of that piece and it was also the first tale for which I received pay. In all, not bad. This post is rambling. That’s what I do best.

What’s Left to See?

darkunderling — Mon, 05 Jul 2010 06:03:26 +0000

Has everything that we need to know been revealed? Do we really know all there is to know? Or are we still yet making discoveries? I really think that we are always finding revelation…it would be silly to think that there is nothing else to discover. Things are always making themselves know to us in many ways, it’s just a matter of looking at how it’s revealed. If we look at it in the right way, we can see things that we may never have seen before because we never knew it was there. And what of the things yet to make themselves known? I do think that such things exist or will exist. It’s a matter of evolving in knowledge…the only way to make strides is to see new things when they appear and be part of the evolution of knowledge. Growing not only involves the physical and mental, but the inetellectual and metaphysical. Growth happens in many ways and in many forms in that case. Wouldn’t it be beneficial to grow in many ways as to make oneself a more fully developed self? What’s left to be discovered? The open mind, I think, says everything.

(from a 2005 posting at My Space)

Out There

darkunderling — Sat, 03 Jul 2010 18:49:49 +0000

As I went into the August night:

Up in the inky tapestry of stars

A formless blue brilliance

Filled the dizzying expanse

And sang of its boundless home.

The vastness of deep space:

Within its abysmal blackness

Winking pinpoints of light

Burn with hues of a

Celestial paint palette.

The coldness of the cosmos:

Within its infinite depths

Giants of gas and rock

Orbit with sister planets

And jagged icy moons.

The savageness of the galaxy:

Within its airless void

Constellations of swirling dust

Die with explosive rage

To be scattered into countless atoms.

Revision 3.0

(Formerly Discord in Harmony/Unconscious Expanse)

Das erste Posting

darkunderling — Fri, 02 Jul 2010 06:50:39 +0000

This is more or less going to be a way for me to both blog and post my (unpublished) work. While I’m not here to set the literary world ablaze with my genius (OK, maybe I am!), I like to think this will be a place where anyone who wants to hear what I have to say can come to listen.

In this first entry, I’ll just give a quick introduction. I am a writer of horror and dark fantasy fiction residing in the bustling northeast portion of the country. I am currently pursuing my BS in nursing at University of Massachusetts Boston while I also work full time. Where the hell do I find time to write? I make time. I usually write between classes or at lunch. I have to carry around a few extra pounds in the form of a laptop, but the pay of has been worth it: I’ve gotten two stories published writing on the go.

When I am not buried in books or writing, I enjoy photography, movies, reading, tending my carnivorous plants, and playing with my little Chi, Jinpei.

Publishing wise, I have work on the website Fantastic Horror and in print from Pill Hill Press and Library of the Living Dead Press. I’ve written fiction and poetry as well as dabbled in digital photographic manipulation and video editing. I am also an editor/administrator at FantasticHorror.com. We are always looking for new submissions for fiction, poetry, and artwork. Please contact me with any questions about the website.

I like to think of myself as an intelligent, open minded, and interesting guy with a lot to talk about. Hopefully, I will keep this current as time goes on. If anyone is reading, thank you.